Hmmm...

Today is clearly a "Mommy's-too-tired-to-choose-to-battle-over-what-you're-wearing" day...

Hurt People Hurt People

I was recently blindsided by an e-mail from a friend. This friend had misinterpreted something I had done and then made some further assumptions that cut me to the quick. I had no idea how to respond. Part of me was angry that she believed things about me that were not true. Part of me was wounded by her words. I was just flummoxed by the whole scenario.

As I was trying to reason out the best way to respond, my brother (and Pastor) wisely reminded me of a story I had told him many years ago.

While in high school I volunteered a number of times for Special Olympics. I absolutely loved being a "hugger"--one who stood at the end of the "race" or "jump" or event and hugged the participants as they finished. But on one particular occasion, instead of being asked to be a "hugger" the person in charge of volunteers paired me with a mentally challenged girl with Down's Syndrome. She had no family or friends at the event to watch or encourage her so I was assigned to walk her from event to event and support her as she participated in each activity.

It was going fairly well until it came time for the long jump. She completed a jump of about a foot and 1/2 and a look of utter disappointment and horror crossed her face. She had thought she would do so much better. I walked toward her to hug her and congratulate her for completing the event and she lashed out, angry at herself for her perceived failure. She began to cry and wail and then to start hitting herself in the face with her fists. I threw my arms around her trying to pin her arms down so she wouldn't injure herself and her fist collided with my right cheek just under my eye. I just kept holding her, whispering in her ear, until she calmed down.

The point my brother was making was this...in her anger, in her pain, she ended up hurting me... the one who was trying to help. But she didn't mean to... it was a by product of her disability.

We are all disabled in one way or another. Some emotionally, some physically, some spiritually...this affects how we act, how we respond, and sometimes it unintentionally hurts those around us. Hurt people hurt people.

This reminder, this nugget of truth was enough to take the edge off my own pain and glimpse the bigger picture. It was enough to soften my heart again toward this friend who I love and compose a response that was honest AND loving. It was enough to remind me of grace.

Thank you, Matt, for the reminder.

Video Statement from Bill and Jane Wales, parents of Erick Wales (MISSING)

PLEASE- Pass this on

MISSING- 6 days, 7 hours, 15 minutes

ERICK WALES is still MISSING! Please repost this, pass it along. You never know who may have seen him. http://www.finderickwales.com

Video Statement from Erick Wales' Parents

Please view this statement from Bill and Jane and pass it along.

Video Statement from Erick Wales’ Parents

Posted using ShareThis

ERICK Still Missing!!!!

Please pass on this link! You can get information and download flyers!

http://www.FindErickWales.com

Still Missing- ERICK WALES

It is almost midnight on Tuesday and Erick is still missing (see post below). There has been a website set up that includes a flyer that people can print and download. Please pass it on...share it with anyone and everyone. And continue to hold Erick and his family and friends in prayer.

FindErickWales.com

Erick Wales is MISSING!

UPDATE 6:26 pm- Erick is still missing. He drives a black Saturn Ion, California plates - FR33BSD.

Jane and Christina are a mother and daughter who I love VERY much! Yesterday morning, Erick (Jane's son and Christina's brother) went missing. He was last seen in San Diego, is in his mid-20's and this is out of character. Please look at the pictures below. I'm also asking that you pray for Jane, Christina and Erick during this uncertain time.

Photo Contest-Vote for me!!!!

Disclaimer: This is a shameless plug...

My dear friend, Cynthia, is one of the most avid (and balanced) environmentalists that I know. She has inspired me in many ways but most evident is probably my new consistent use of reusable shopping bags.

On Friday, our families went out to dinner to celebrate Larry's birthday and the birthday card they gave Larry was the coolest thing! She had purchased it through the Arbor Day Foundation and the purchase goes toward planting a tree in one of our National Parks. This thrilled Emma (my little nature lover) and so today she decided to send an electronic version to her BFF, Madeline, in Indiana for HER birthday. While we were on the site we noticed a banner for a photo contest they are holding. The grand prize winner's photo will be featured on their Give-a-Tree cards. Emma and I got very excited because I enjoy (just for my own pleasure) taking photos of trees and plants that fascinate me. We immediately went through some of my more recent ones and chose the following photos to submit. (Each person can submit up to four photos.)

Please logon to Arbor Day Foundation to vote for one of my photos (you can search by photographer... under Melissa B.)

WIN!!! If you leave a comment here, I will enter you in random drawing to win your own personalized card with your favorite photo. You can get additional entries in the drawing by referring your friends to the link or posting it on your blog or Facebook. Just comment here with links to your "referrals" OR have your friend comment here with your name somewhere in the comment so you get credit for the referral!

Why I'm Not Crazy About UNICEF...

I know. I know. Believe me, I know that UNICEF has done some fabulous humanitarian work. However, the fact remains that they have an aggressive anti-international adoption stance. They seem to prefer that a child grow up in an institution (orphanage) in their own culture than with a forever family in another culture. To give you an idea of why I have issues with Unicef, I'd like to share with you a blog post by The Joint Council on International Children's Services. It will explain a lot!

Be The Answer

A Little Late...

Well, we've always had good intentions for starting family devotions and somehow every time we tried it fizzled... usually because of schedules, boring/cheesy material or just lack of discipline. We are trying again (pray for us!).

When I discovered the book that we are using for our women's Bible Study, I noticed that the author had also created a dinner devotion book for families. Because I admire her adult material and I feel confident with her theology, I decided to order it.

In the week or so that we've been using it, it has gone pretty well. Only a few groans and sighs when we pull it out. They are fairly brief which works for us although I have noticed that it sometimes tend to be a little over Maddie's head (just turned 6 years old). I've found that we can usually have one of the other kids explain it in their words to her and I think that's a GOOD thing!

Do you use family devotions in your home? If so, what material do you use? Or do you simply read through scripture? If so, do you have a method to what you choose to read?

Re-entering the Real World (and the blogosphere)

Yes, it's true. I'm back... not that I think anyone is actually reading this or was waiting with bated breath for my next blog entry but, well... here I am. In addition to returning to my blog, I find myself after four straight months of performing, plus rehearsal time, returning to the life of full-time mom and out-of-work actress.

My show, "Joyful Noise", just closed last Sunday and I have to say that it was one of the most emotionally difficult closings I have ever experienced. I think in part because everyone else in the cast was moving on to their next project while I do not have anything "lined up". I also believe it's because I'm feeling particularly vulnerable in my abilities as a mom. Also, coinciding with my return to full time family chauffeur, Larry is traveling Monday thru Thursday this week. And believe me, that leaves a HUGE hole for me to fill.

Nevertheless, I plug ahead. I started a new devotional, "The One Year Book of Hope", to help keep me on track as well as a women's Bible Study on Hebrews, "Hoping for Something Better". I know that in order to be the mom I need to be, I need to be growing spiritually.

I also revamped our "chore" routine. Today I worked on our pegboard and also added a daily rotation list for 6 chores that will rotate between the three older kids. For the ones that don't rotate, I use the PEGS system, an invaluable tool I picked up at a Hearts at Home conference a few years back. I'm hoping this will help add some order back into a house that has been flying by the seat of its pants since we moved in back June!

That's the update for now!

Tell me... what do YOU do when your routine needs a kick in the pants???

iHeartFaces

Just found this contest... the theme this week is "contemplative" (thoughtful observation; full or deep consideration; dreamily or wistfully thoughtful: a pensive mood; expressing or revealing thoughtfulness; quiet modes of apparent or real thought; can be marked by some sadness, but doesn't have to be)

Grace in Small Things...

(sorry... no pics from last night)

... bbq dinners with friends

...working in a profession I love with people I love

(that's me on the far left in the orange and teal)

...sunsets from my backyard

...captured moments


...precious memories of missed friends

Grace In Small Things...

Picture day...

Frosted mug of Dt. Pepsi with lime on a very hot day...

My daughter who loves and cares for all living things...

My son finding something he loves to learn...

Home.

Our beach outing...

I didn't even want to go. My kids were completely out of sorts and I really just wanted to lock them all in their rooms, turn up the air conditioning and lay down with a good book BUT school starts on Monday and we haven't even been to the beach yet, so... off to the beach we went. It ended up being a nice break from the tension.

Grace in Small Things # 2

Today I am facing the daylight with an hour and 1/2 of sleep behind me due to overwhelming anxiety. I need this discipline...

My grace in small things today:
1. Preschool- so I can nap
2. An awesome real estate agent who advocates fiercely for her clients
3. A 10 year old who wakes up with energy and a smile almost EVERY morning
4. Cool mornings
5. Children who can dress themselves (they may not match but they can put the clothes on themselves!)

God of This City

I love this song and found this on YouTube... Kris Allen from American Idol leading his church in worship...

Grace in Small Things # 1

I am joining the ranks of Grace in Small Things. I need this right now. (Thank you, LoveDrunk! You inspired me!) You can join me...it's so simple and so often just the thing we need.

1. My new house closing this week.

2. A husband who (even though he's sick) made me my favorite kind of egg (over-easy) with a slice of toast for breakfast.

3. A preschooler who loves to use her imagination.

4. Hot coffee (made by my wonderful husband, of course) waiting when I wake up.

5. Having the memory increased on my computer so it runs like a dream (silly, huh? but so great!)

Mission and Living in Community

This is my friend, Katy. She attends Crossroads with us and today was her last day in San Diego. She and her husband, along with their four children, will be traveling cross country as they raise support for the mission field. They are currently planning on leaving for the mission field in August. It was a difficult goodbye for several reasons one of which is that I regret that I didn't have the opportunity to spend as much time as I would have liked with someone I have found so much in common with (did I just end that sentence with a preposition? Ugh). She has been such an example of grace to me in the short time I've known her. I've watched her love her children and her husband with humility and courage and delighted in the joys of seeing God miraculously provide for her in the most unusual ways.

In the midst of her family leaving, our church has been facing a major transition as well. We are moving away from a Sunday gathering/attractional service orientation to smaller Missional Communities that meet weekly and then gather all together once or twice a month. To facilitate this move, the leaders have been studying the concept of Missional Communities or "house churches". This week in particular I was convicted and energized by the areas of mission and the gospel that I have been at the very least ignoring and the worst, running full force from. (There's that damn preposition again!) This morning as our church family said goodbye to Katy and her family and prayed over them and their mission overseas, I knew that God was asking us to support them financially. My first, gut reaction was, "Wait! But I want my house! I need a house! We can't afford to commit any more money to another budget line item!" So as I sat there trying to ignore the Holy Spirit, Matt started his sermon... which was about "Living in Mission". Somewhere in the midst of the sermon he went through a list of what living on mission would be characterized by (sorry... my brain is too tired to phrase these sentence without the prep at the end!). The one that jumped out and slapped me upside the head was "foolish generosity". Oh great. Now God wasn't giving me an excuse. So I argued a little...

"Now, God... here's the deal. I know intellectually that making a commitment that financially doesn't make sense right now, in this economy would just not be wise. Besides, while I'm committed to You and to our church, I still don't 'feel' the passion for this community yet. I don't have real roots here. I'm being obedient but I just don't 'feel' it yet."

No sooner had I gone through the whole spiel then I was overcome with sorrow. Sorrow at my lack of faith, sorrow for the lost and sorrow for my lack of action. The tears just spilled. I knew that we would be making the commitment to Katy and her family. I knew it was right and I knew that I was going to have to trust that God really is sovereign and he has called us to foolish generosity.

So, this is how missional community works. As a member of our community enters into the mission that God has called her to, it has ripple effects throughout the rest of the community. It is spurring me on to live more missionally myself, pushing me toward trusting in God's sovereignty and toward obedience. THIS is what Missional Community is supposed to be.

For more information of the types of Missional Communities I am referring to, visit:

Soma Communities
Crowded House
Tim Chester's Blog
Jeff Vanderstelt's Blog