Monday, October 28, 2013

Day 123

Day 123 of waiting (really, God?) - Psalm 123

I lift my eyes to you,
    O God, enthroned in heaven.

Today I feel like Hannah who wept bitterly (yes... the Bible says "bitterly") before the Lord (1 Samuel 1:10), pleading for her son.  This wait has been excruciating, filled with moments of
frustration and even intense fear when we had no news on his physical condition. It is already very clear to us that Benjamin Lilu belongs to the Lord... he is evidence of God's providence and glory... his miraculous life can't be chalked up to "fate" or "luck"... it is God's hand at work in his life, even to the point of saving it.  Every adoption starts with brokenness.  It begins with a tragedy.  To add to that the physical anguish that Benjamin has lived through in his short 5 1/2 years... well, it's almost unbearable.  The wonder of it all is that we get the opportunity to see God's redemptive work in his life.  We even get to participate in it.  Nevertheless, my prayer today is "O Lord, I am calling to you. Please hurry! Listen when I cry to you for help!" (borrowing from Psalm 141 - oh, dear Lord... please do not let us get to Psalm 141!)

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