Many of you know but for those who don't, I suffer from dysthymia, which is basically "chronic, low-grade depression". It is difficult to describe to people and it took years to finally admit and get some treatment. I thought for years that it was a character issue or even a spiritual one. And while I believe that I face some spiritual struggles because of the depression, the depression itself cannot be written up to a "lack of faith" or "sin". The other aspect of my depression is that people are often unaware of it or are surprised when they find out that I struggle with it daily. (Yes, daily. Some days the fight is harder than others.) I believe this is for a number of reasons...in general I am strong willed and fairly functional. Also, I have a deep faith that carries me each day and a strangle hold on grace that I won't loosen my grip on. And, if I'm honest right now, I also fake it pretty well in public. There you have it.
So, back to "Her Morning Elegance". I felt like someone had gazed into the heart and head of a woman who knows, experiences what I do on a daily basis. I love the creativity in expressing something that can be so dark yet is a common daily occurrence for those of us who face chronic, low-grade depression each morning. I also love the bed in the video. I can't tell you how often I just want to stay there! It is a great metaphor that resonated with me to the core.
Here are the lyrics...watch the video! (Thank you to the artist, Oren Lavie)
Sun been down for days
A pretty flower in a vase
A slipper by the fireplace
A cello lying in its case
Soon she's down the stairs
Her morning elegance she wears
The sound of water makes her dream
Awoken by a cloud of steam
She pours a daydream in a cup
A spoon of sugar sweetens up
And she fights for her life
As she puts on her coat
And she fights for her life on the train
She looks at the rain
As it pours
And she fights for her life
As she goes in a store
With a thought she has caught
By a thread
She pays for the bread
And she goes...Nobody knows
Sun been down for days
A winter melody she plays
The thunder makes her contemplate
She hears a noise behind the gate
Perhaps a letter with a dove
Perhaps a stranger she could love
And she fights for her life
As she puts on her coat
And she fights for her life on the train
She looks at the rain
As it pours
And she fights for her life
As she goes in a store
With a thought she has caught
By a thread
She pays for the bread
And she goes...Nobody knows
And she fights for her life
As she puts on her coat
And she fights for her life on the train
She looks at the rain
As it pours
And she fights for her life
As she goes in a store
Where the people are pleasantly
Strange
And counting the change
And she goes...Nobody knows
